You aren't unattractive .. you're just numb

Hey mate,

If women keep pulling away from you or you just feel invisible to them, this might be why.

It’s not because you need more money, better looks, or to be taller somehow.

Those things can help…

But after coaching hundreds of men, I’ve noticed something deeper that turns women off .. and most men have no idea.

Let me tell you about a client of mine named Greg.

Greg is in his early forties.

He’s successful, in great shape, and well put together.

On paper, he has everything.

Yet he has spent decades feeling unseen by women.

He told me, “I feel like I’m still fifteen years old. I’ve never really grown up. I’m still seeking approval.”

Even in his relationships, Greg said he never truly CHOSE the woman.

He went along with it because she showed interest first.

But all his relationships ended the same way.

The spark faded, she lost respect, and eventually she left.

Every time he was left confused and hurt.

When I spoke with Greg, I saw something familiar in his eyes.

A vacant, distant look I call the dissociated glare. 

I could tell in that moment, he was disconnected.

It’s like he wasn’t even in the room.

That glare is a sign that a man’s nervous system is stuck in a freeze response.

This often happens after years of subtle emotional pain, rejection, and unmet needs.

Over time, the body learns to shut down to avoid feeling hurt again.

That shutdown is what women pick up on INSTANTLY.

When a man is emotionally disconnected, her body tenses.

She can’t explain why, but something feels off.

She can’t trust or relax around him because he’s not fully there.

For a woman to relax and open around you, she needs to feel emotionally safe.

But if YOU feel disconnected, anxious or numb in your body .. she will feel the same way (humans are ultra social creatures and most communication in non-verbal).

And she will ghost, flake or friendzone you .. and she won’t even tell you why.

So in order to build the kind of attraction with women, it’s not WHAT you say .. but how you feel when you’re speaking with her that makes the difference.

But as an analytical (and intelligent) man .. that’s not easy.

The work begins by loosening your grip on overthinking.

Constant analysing is often a defence mechanism built to protect you from pain.

You have to start thawing those frozen emotions and reconnecting with your body.

And recognise when you’re in a spiral of hyper-analysis .. and refuse to be pulled down that rabbit hole.

The will build the kind of unforgettable presence that women feel safe and drawn to.

This is a big part of the work I do with clients.

So if Greg’s story resonates with you, it’s time to take the next step.

Book a free 30-minute call and we’ll map out a clear plan for you to build the kind of calm, connected, and fulfilling relationships you want.

Click here to book your call.

Take care,

Stay courageous,

Oliver