Alright mate,

I used to crave the validation and approval of women.

Practically every aspect of my life, at one point, was centered around making women like me.

(I read Crime and Punishment by Dostoyevsky partly because I thought it would make me more appealing to “sapiosexual” women… my brother in Christ…)

All of it driven by this existential need for female approval.

And it worked, or so I thought.

I had girlfriends. I had experiences. I got laid a bunch.

But deep down, even with all that validation, I still felt like an insecure boy.

Deeply afraid of being seen.

Believing that if a truly amazing woman saw me, she would run a mile from me

(this is why I chose women I saw no future with. It was safer).

The real shift for me began when I had an epiphany…

This next part might be a bit too raw, but it’s the truth so here you go:

4 years ago, I was scrubbing my mattress clean of blood (and god knows what else) after yet another empty meaningless hookup with a woman I didn’t care about.

I thought I was cleaning the mattress.

But really? I was desperately trying to clean away the shame I felt.

A part of me knew I was a fraud and I was afraid.

I was good at performing the role of a grounded, confident man.

But I wasn’t actually either of those things.

I had just created a more attractive mask.

And not only was it destroying my relationships with women.

It was destroying my relationship with myself.

After that, I made the decision to stop performing and start being honest (possibly for the first time ever).

It was one of the scariest things I’ve ever done.

But it was the beginning of my liberation.

One of the most important resources I had around this time was joining an online men’s group.

Every week, I had a place where I could be safely and fully witnessed.. not as the character I’d created, but as the man I actually was.

Over time, I started to notice when I was masking… and when I wasn’t.

Because other men would lovingly tell me.

With the support of solid men, I began to heal the wounds of growing up with an abusive, alcoholic father.

I learned to trust men again and stop being such a lone wolf.

To relax into connection and to trust myself enough to stop hiding with everyone.

What I eventually realised was this:

I wasn’t lacking women in my life. I was lacking grounded, healthy masculine presence.

My approval-seeking wasn’t genuine desire.

It was my inner boy looking for safety and reassurance in the only way he knew how.

That men’s group was the beginning of my initiation into manhood.

And it all started with just 90 minutes a week where I could be fully accepted for exactly who I was .. without being let off the hook for ways I was fucking myself over.

Which is why every week, I help other men go through the same unmasking process that I did.

For the next 24 hours, I'm opening 3 spots for men to join the group in preparation for our call on Tuesday.

After that, doors are closed until May.

So if you’re done living for women’s (or anyone’s) approval.

If you’re ready to find out who you actually are beneath the mask…

And start being that man boldly, courageously and totally unapologetically…

Find out more and apply by clicking this link.

I’ll see 3 of you on Tuesday (who will it be?)

Stay courageous

Oliver